Monday, August 25, 2014

1 (Very tiring) Year!

At this time last year I was in the hospital, Rachel by my side, for an entire night preparing for labor. Sawyer was nice and toasty in my womb and didn't want to come out. A week past my due date and they had to soften the ol' cervix, causing me to be awake much of the night. I remember Amy coming by as well, we chatted a bit then it was just Rachel and me, trying to get a little rest before life got much busier than ever before.
I don't even remember what time he was born, is that horrible or what? I think it was late morning/early afternoon. That's #3 for you, little details are a blur. It was the best labor though, compared to Blake it was a walk in the park & I had the most incredible midwife who made it fun and relaxed. Well, as good as labor can possibly be.

NOTHING was as scary as driving home with 3 kids in the car (we picked up Blake and Iris from my parents house) and thinking how in the world are we going to do this? A newborn and two toddlers just felt so overwhelming to me. Those early days were HARD. Having meals brought to me was a huge help. Having Celeste pick up my kids and take them to a fun play date was awesome. Having my mom come over almost every day for 2 weeks to take Blake and Iris on a walk was incredible. Having family near by for support made all the difference.

It's been a hard year. Good, but lots of changes & lots of sacrifice. I've always thought of Sawyer as a slice of heaven, I didn't know with my history of miscarriages that I'd ever get to experience pregnancy after Blake so it was a gift to have Sawyer this way. I knew that perhaps I wanted to try for one more and although I have asked myself plenty of times was this really the best timing??? I know God has brought Joe and I through this to strengthen us, show us our weakness & reliance on Him with such a huge task of raising kids!

He makes me laugh and smile each day and I can't kiss and cuddle him enough. If I could have looked into time the afternoon that I had my second miscarriage & I sat alone & the quiet just killed me and wondered if I would ever be a this night, celebrating Sawyer, my 3rd child's life - wow, God has given me more than I ever thought possible. Happy Birthday Sawyer.